Embracing Your Many Purposes
I think we live in a world where we are groomed for purpose from the moment we enter it. I think most parents (good parents anyway) focus on raising their kids to be educated citizens with moral compasses so that they can eventually leave the nest be productive adult members of society. They feed you, clothe you, and educate you, and then you turn 18 and they throw you to the wolves and you’re left to figure out the rest just kidding. I think sometimes we’re taught that our purpose on earth is to find our purpose, and to leave a positive impact on the world. And I think the fact that that’s what we’re taught is what makes us believe it. Clearly, I think a lot of things.
The title of this blog post is “Why Your Purpose Might Not Be Your Purpose At All”. I’m not saying that what you feel in your heart is your purpose is in fact not your purpose. What I’m saying is that you might have purposes, plural. If you’re anything like the typical millennial in today’s day and age, you’re probably college educated, employed, excited and a little stressed about adulting, but confident, ready to take on any challenge, and maybe a little unsure of where to start. Now let’s bring the focus in a little: if you’re anything like this particular millennial (aka me), you might be more than a little unsure of where to start. Many of us were taught (by our parents and by society) to go to school, get good grades, be well rounded, attend college, figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life, get your degree, and go do it. And let’s be clear, I don’t think parents who raised their children in this way are bad parents. In fact, I think they’re smart parents. They want to ensure that their children will have a steady source of income so that they can provide for themselves. Makes sense.
But where I think society has failed us in some ways is this emphasis on “purpose”, singular. We go to school to get a degree for our one purpose. We then go find a job or become entrepreneurs and do work, focused on that one purpose. We then spend the rest of our lives, devoting our work and energy to that one purpose (this is pretty general obviously, just go with me here). There’s so much pressure to find your “purpose”, when maybe you have more than one.
Now that I’ve said all of that, we can get on to part 2 of this post: embracing your purpose or many purposes and finding your self-care rhythm within that endeavor, and I say endeavor because walking in purpose and on purpose is a journey. If you’re passionate about more than one thing, you may have more than one purpose. If that is the case, it may be a little harder for you to navigate that space, simply because that’s not exactly how we’ve been nurtured to operate. Perhaps the additional pressure to find your purpose could be relieved by the fact that you don’t have to find “it” in the sea of “them”. You can have all of them. On the other hand, some of us were created with one purpose, and that’s great! Here are a few things that I’ve learned on my journey to embrace my purposes(s) and finding my self-care rhythm within:
Boundaries Are Necessary
I had to make this number one because I need it to be in my face, all the time. Boundaries can be HARD, especially when you feel led to do a lot of things or help a lot of people. But without boundaries, we often times end up overextended and underserved. While our purposes are more times than not linked to serving or helping others in some way, we must also serve ourselves(read more on my take on selfishness and selflessness here). “You can’t pour out of an empty cup”. We’ve all heard it a million times, and it’s true. Boundaries allow us to fulfill our purpose(s), keep our cups full, and avoid burnout.
Stick to Your Blueprint
Everybody will not get it. Maybe your purpose is to be a doctor and your math and science grades suck. Maybe your purpose is to be an artist and artwork sales are slow. Maybe your purpose is to be a motivational speaker and you haven’t booked a gig yet. While you understand that that’s your purpose and you see that the path you’re on (however rocky it may be) will get your there, everybody else might not. But guess what? That’s why it’s your purpose. Everybody will not get it because it’s not everybody’s business to get. Don’t be swayed by the opinions of others. After all, you’re the one with the blueprint.
“Busiest” and “Most Exhausted” are not badges of honor
Once upon a time I really thought that being busy meant that I was getting closer to fulfilling certain goals. Now, I’ve always looked at people Team “I’ll Sleep When I’m Dead” like they
Re crazy, but honestly, Team “Busy Yourself into Exhaustion” is in the same category. Your purpose is yours, it’s not going to run from you if you don’t get everything done in 24 hours. Being excessively busy and not sleeping like you should does not mean you’re dedicated; it just means that you’re burned out and exhausted. While getting things done does take a little dedication and perhaps a few less hours of sleep every now and then, this should not be the norm by any means!
Be Yourself
So cliché and a little corny, I know. But I’m a little corny so it’s only right, right? Confidence and passion go hand in hand. Being who you are, possessing whatever gifts you have, and walking in your purpose will take your further than your wildest dreams. Passionate people are proud of themselves and the work they produce. Without your confidence to back your purpose, it will flop. Your confidence and your gifts are the fuel for your purpose, so be yourself.
I hope that this post gets you thinking about your purpose or many purposes, and helps you learn how to fulfill your purpose in a way that will serve both you and others best.
Thanks for journeying with me.